A few spoons short of a dinner
Ok, so it would seem no one wants to confess how many lipsticks they own… or it will take too long for you to count them. If you want a quick counting item, then I vote go the teaspoons.
I don’t know where they go. Teaspoons have an amazing habit of disappearing in my household. I live with 2 cats. I ask you, what would two fat torties want with my teaspoons? They could be with the lost socks… which one would expect to find in the laundry… only I don’t have one of those.
Perhaps it’s because the teaspoons are so desirable. I can’t quite understand why when they sell sets of cutlery, you get knives, forks and LARGE spoons. Of the latter, there appears to be two types. Those that are usable – (should all the teaspoons be missing) – and those which are just physically too large. Despite this I haven’t managed to part with the spoons. I look at them and have the ‘but I might need them one day’ thought. The same goes for that pair of socks which are too tight around your calves, or, worse, the pair that have lost their ability to ‘stand up’ and they shrivel like the Wicked Witch of the West around your ankle. Of course, no item holding the title ‘deserving of the rubbish bin but never quite making it’ would be complete without mention of the granny undies. These are the undies that are just that bit too big. That bit too uncomfortable and in my case, if this is not too personal a confession for the web, even that hideous beige granny undies colour. I can’t recall what got into me that day. I remember going to buy white underwear. There was no white. I must have had a lapse in judgement and thought… the beige ones aren’t too bad. Hmm. Wrong.
What is it about beige that is just, well… beige? I blame Billy Connolly. Before he started on it, beige was just a synonym for cream.
If you are starting to wonder whether there is any real point to this post, then you are clearly an inexperienced reader of my blog. I often wonder whether there is any point to any of them! For this one, it’s a case of being in a reflective mood about the really important issues confronting the world. I’m sure that you will agree, that teaspoons and granny knickers sit right up there beside poverty and global warming. Do you not concur?
PS: How delightful. My ‘tag’ suggestion list includes ‘undergarment’. Not undies, or underwear. Nope. ‘Undergarment.’ How very Victorian!