Hamster on crack
Last night I went for a drive with ‘4’ in my new car. After testing that he could get in and out of both the passenger and drivers seat, I handed him the keys. ‘Where should we go?’ he asked me like a 4 year old desperate to raid the nearest lolly shop. I said I didn’t care provided I got a mcflurry. So we drove to the blue mountains!
4 delighted in testing out the clutchless manual. New car – must test the acceleration. Hmmm… I nervously clutch seat. He ‘plays’ with shifting gears with enthusiasm normally reserved for a labrador at dinnertime. I start to squirm in my seat. ‘I promise I won’t hurt your car’ he says spotting the look of worry on my face. Maybe I should keep a note of when you were driving – should there be any little tickets coming in the mail because you were too excited to notice that the speed limit changed about 500 metres back. ‘Are you ok chicken?’ Umm… yes I try to squeak when really me head is filled with clatter. 4 starts to laugh. ‘You’re hyperventilating. I can feel the change in biorhythms. You’re like a hamster on crack.’
The ‘on speed’ analogy is probably fit for today as well. I woke up feeling shocking and had a head full of barking instructions. Got to finish the stitching on the collar; do the contract work; oh shivers, need to clear that kitchen bench; um, chemist now; toes are itchy – stress related eczema; what do I have to do tomorrow again; paints wet watch out cat; you’re going to where? Newcastle in 10 mins. No I can’t go; and so on.
I finally threw up this painting this evening. I say throw up deliberately. Often these quick sketches are an almost uncontrollable release. All day I was twitching and thinking – yes like a scurrying hamster on crack – finally I spat out this painting and got some peace. Whilst painting the endless list of chores and demands in my head ceased.
Meet Stella – a product of my stress. Yes, she’s not the cheeriest face in history; not beautifully rendered or even proportionally correct but I have no concern for any of those things. She let out the noise in my head and therefore I greet her happily.