By the royal power invested in us from the planet of Feline, we hereby declare that this armchair is now the property of the species tortoise shell and no human can enter. Bribery in the form of chest and head salutes will be considered momentarily and although we like this ‘patting’ currency, we will still reject all human efforts to take position of said armchair.
In short, it’s ours.
Ezekial it seems is dead. I was hoping 42 readers would submit 3 words a piece for me to use in a blog post challenge. If I didn’t get 42 people, I gave myself permission to duck out of this, as using 126 reader selected words in one post and have it make sense was going to be a challenge!
As I am well short of the 42 people I was after, then I offer this instead as an alternative. Here are the 42 words from the original Ezekial the budgie story – once again, all from readers.
I’ve put those words, together with the few I did get recently as ‘supplementaries’ below and I challenge you, to write a story which includes these 42 words. How to participate:
My story became about a transger budgerigar who eloped with a moose. What will yours be?
transgender, infantile, squiggly, defenestration, acrylic, brain, orange, slender, true, fancy, revelation, creeping, forming.
It was almost a disaster. I lost the 55th piece of my fibonacci flower. Some people may have just decided that it had to stay with 54 pieces but I could not. I hunted through sewing bags; down the back of my sewing cupboard, under the sewing machine, on the floor, in the scraps. I was looking for a piece of fabric about 3/4″ wide. Once I stopped looking, I found it.
At the moment, the flower looks a little silly as it is without stem. That piece of gold and orange batik will be reduced once the stem goes on. I tried two methods of ‘needle-turn’ applique for the main pieces. The first I stitched the line on the sewing machine and then clipped and turned under with the iron. The second – the gold one – I used a palette knife and glue stick. This is because I’m not very safe with an iron – or at least my fingers aren’t!
And on a completely unrelated subject, here are the girls, grooming themselves simultaneously. I often think to myself when Cat Protection Society said they were inseparable, they were absolutely right. In this short video they even turn to each other’s name! (Saffron is on left, Licorice on right).
Some time ago I wrote a blog post to celebrate reaching 42 followers. The idea was simple, I was going to write a post using 42 words submitted by my readers, with up to 3 words each. Some of my readers were kind and chose simple words. Others – who shall remain nameless – pulled out all stops and picked really challenging words.
The rules were that if I got more than 42 words submitted, I’d use the extras as supplementaries, like lotto balls!
This week, I reached 3 times the 42 followers. So, in celebration, I will attempt this again – except this time with 126 words. You have until Friday 14th June 2013 to submit up to 3 words in a comment to this post. If I don’t get 126 words by Friday, I have permission to duck out of this.
If I do, then Ezekial the budgie shall return for another adventure.
For those who aren’t in my original 42 readers and may not have read the result from the first time, here’s the link. It remains one of my most read blog posts of all time.
42 follower submitted words in one post: meet Ezekial the budgie.
Don’t forget to add 3 words in a comment on this post, so Ezekial can return!
I want to know why it is that a cat attempting to sit in your lap – especially when you don’t want it to – almost always manages to put it’s paw right where your bladder is? (For anyone interested I haven’t had children, my pelvic floor muscles are good so there has been no cat induced accident in this house)
Secondly, I want to know why when you sit on the couch doing nothing, the cat sleeps on the floor. As soon as you pick up a laptop, it’s anti-sharing instinct kicks in and the cat is determined to displace said laptop.
This is what Licorice is doing at this very moment. Now consider this: I am attempting to type this post with an 8 kilo weight on my left hand wrist. I’ll show you. (My right hand is free to use the iphone camera and it’s within my reach).
Those are my fingers emerging from heavy cat. Do you notice the two empty cat beds on the right hand side of the photo. Those would be the beds they are NOT sleeping in, even though I have turned the heater on. If I want them to actually sleep in the beds, then I need to turn the heater off and then they will go close to those beds and look pitifully at me and meow their request for the heater to be turned on.)
Ah relief. Licorice has decided to get off my hand. My wrist thanks her.
Of course, this cat displacement technique is not just unique to the laptop. Any computer is fair game as illustrated by Gesso here, relegating Andrew to one hand typing, unless Andrew wants to risk Gesso slipping off and falling down his legs. Not really a good risk on careful consideration really. We all know how cats use their claws to climb trees.
Andrew and Gesso
And while I’m asking questions about my cat’s interpretation of her rights in this household, I have a few more to add.
Why does Saffron so confidently claim ownership of any ‘green’ shopping bag? Is there some title deed written into such bags via cat scent that upon returning home with one, your cat as the right to take immediate possession of it and not return it for 3 days? (Excuse any typos from here, Licorice is back on wrist…. and part of touchpad). The royal cat prerogative exempts her from having to give the bag back for it’s original use. It is as if Green Bags are subject to squatters rights.
And why is it that cats are never interested in fitting themselves into a suitable size box, green bag, cat bed etc. Perhaps the things I have heard about a cat using her whiskers to judge whether it will fit through a space is just bunk. I can assure you that my cats either have ridiculously long whiskers, or when their whiskers sent the alert signal to their brain, they just ignore it. When I bought the cheap cat bed recently (a $5 purchase in a two-dollar shop), I deliberately chose the smallest one I could find because I am so used to my girls turning their noses up at anything which is of reasonable size. And regular readers of my blog will know, what happened then.
Can’t we share?
I’m not finished yet. I have a few more questions about my cat’s prerogative. I want to know why when it’s really cold and you want the cat to sit in your lap and act as a pseudo-hot water bottle, she just isn’t interested. Crank up the temperature to a Sydney hot day of 30 something degrees and my lap is the most desirable location in the house.
And why is it that I can buy a ‘covered’ litter tray so in theory when the cat kicks the litter around it will hit the ‘roof’ and land in the box, that I still seem to have a trail of kitty litter across my bathroom floor. Kitty litter is the cat equivalent of Hansel and Gretel breadcrumbs, though I really don’t get why they need them. I would expect if the cat wanted to re-trace her steps she would only need to follow the smell back to the bathroom. Unless of course, I’ve been the obedient cat servant that I’m supposed to be and cleaned the tray within 5 minutes of usage.
And why is it that anytime I want to photograph something, a cat must help by inspecting it at the same time I’m trying to take the photo.
Pickle inspecting the subject of my photography
They have an inbuilt instinct which must say ‘quick walk on it now!’ And lastly, why is it that given all the trouble they cause with flea management and cat hair and little nail shards at the floor of the scratching post, that we still love them as much as we do? I’m sure many servants dislike their masters but I will not include cat servants among them. In fact, we humble servants seem to enjoy having a laugh at how much privilege our cats bestow upon themselves. Here’s one example of that that I saw via Facebook recently – it’s had a few million views so I’m sure that it’s done the rounds and you may have seen it. For those who haven’t, I’ve included the sad cat diary below.
Of particular note for me is one of the opening diary entries about cats and keyboards – I think Licorice must have heard that when I played it the first time and she is now just demonstrating the point. With that, I think it is time for me to stop blogging and give her a proper cuddle.
Lately I’ve been stitching more than painting. I’m not convinced that they aren’t the same practice for me but in a different media. I’ve had a few paintings on the go. All very small scale (A3 or smaller) and mostly unclear in their direction. The one above has been floating around on and off as an A3 piece for ages. I had layered Golden Fluid Acrylics in my usual fashion – here using Quinacridone Burnt Orange, Transparent Red Iron Oxide and Phthalo Blue.
The choice of colour combination was extremely scientific. Those particular bottles were almost empty and I wanted to use them up so I could toss the bottles out. (My little unit is very cluttered and while on a practical day I can see that removing 3 small bottles is really not going to do much, at the time it seemed like a good idea).
However it was going nowhere fast.
It’s probably been on the table for the better part of a month. So I did what I often do when an art piece isn’t progressing – I do something drastic! In this case, I got a stanley knife and cut my A3 piece down to A4. From there, after some rummaging in my collage materials, the piece ‘appeared’. I can’t explain how this happens; it just suddenly comes together.
It was almost ‘adjusted’ by Saffron planting her bum on the table. Fortunately, she was about 1 inch from the wet paint. Of course, it’s the only time she has sat on the table in recent history. She rarely leaves the heater. Even when it’s not on she sits next to it in hope! As does her sister… here they are at it again!
Recently I was fiddling around with some fabric and ended up creating these ‘mushrooms’ by hand stitching using perle cotton. I wasn’t sure what I was going to do with them but I had an idea to incorporate them into a small lap quilt.
After some pondering and meddling by my dressmaking teacher, the idea of a Fibonacci Floral Lap Quilt was born. I loved the lines in the ‘mushrooms’ and wanted to use the colour of this background fabric (a faded grey-green to blue; not unlike the leaves on some wattle trees) in ‘strips’.
Step 1: Make a life size template
I daresay a sophisticated photocopier may have come in handy here and an extra big piece of paper. However I adopted the thrifty method. My piece of paper is in fact 6 pieces of paper stuck together with masking tape. With a ruler and a pencil, I carefully enlarged the drawing to actual size (about 18.5″ X 20″ – no there’s nothing fibonacci about the dimensions!)
Step 2: Dividing the Flower by the fibonacci number
You may be wondering where’s the fibonacci piece of this quilt. It’s coming! As I was choosing fabrics, it was suggested to me that I should try to use fibonacci numbers (e.g. 2,3,5,8,13,21 etc). I knew that I wanted the fabric pieces to probably be between 1/2″ and 1.5″ in width. So I had a choice – 34 strips or 55. The former made the strips far too fat. So I had no choice but to try to divide the flower outline I had drawn into 55 strips without making any of them too small to sew and also trying to vary the widths as I went along so it didn’t look too predictable.
Step 3: Selecting fabrics and cutting strips
So I now had a template of 55 strips, and 13 fabrics selected. (13 being a fibonacci number). The next challenge was whether I could use on a fibonacci number of each fabric within the 55 strips. Now any person halfway decent at math would be able to figure this out quickly. I have to confess that it took me a while.
The end result is:
Of course, while you are laying out your fabrics and deciding the order, cat help is critical! Licorice supervised. For once she didn’t ‘help.’
By this point, I was chuffed that I had managed to use only fibonacci numbers – 55 strips, 13 fabrics of 2, 3 or 5 instances each. I was also starting to wonder what the point was. Dr Google told me that fibonacci numbers are common in nature – in Irises, sunflowers and pine cones and they were naturally pleasing to the eye. Oh well… it was worth a go.
Step 4: Tracing the template onto stitch and tear
When it came to tracing I cheated and used a lightbox. Saffron thought she’d help be sitting on the lightbox. Unfortunately, the lightbox is not designed for a 6 kilo cat, so I had to continually kick her off for fear the perspex was not going to withstand her weight – it’s loose as it is!
Step 5: Critical. After cutting the pieces. Drop them.
It really would be no fun if you didn’t have to put them back in order at least once!
Iron pieces onto the back of the fabric strips.
Step 6: Trim them up!
I left 1/4″ seam allowance on the long sides and a very rough half an inch or so on the stop. I figured I could always tidy up the ends later.
Step 7: Sew the strips together
This was the fun bit – watching it start to take shape. I’m about 70% done. (Hence the part 1). I’ll be sure to post pics when I have finished the flower.
Meanwhile in cat land, a territory dispute is at play. I bought a cheap cat bed from the $2 store. They only had 1 in this size. Licorice and Saffron both want to sit in it. Generally, they seem to alternate – every now and then one ‘hijacks’ it from the other. Tonight, Licorice wouldn’t give it up. So Saffron just sat on top of her!
Can’t we share?
I’ve been abandoned. My lap is no longer good enough. The heater is better!
My absurdly talented partner Andrew painted this portrait in 1 day. There are so many things I love about this painting. If I had to choose what made this painting feel so much like me, I’d have to say its the couple of wayward hair strands across the forehead and down the side and the dulled green in my hair.
8 weeks without a stable phone and internet and finally, it has been restored!
To celebrate, I’ve posted a photo of Saffron I took about a month ago but haven’t been able to upload.
I love this shot. It shows how I bought a couch to blend with my cat (and in theory hide the cat hair which, judging by that segment of black on the cushion, has not worked!) It also shows my troublesome little companion relaxing. This is a nice change from when she has cystitis. Also, I just had to post a cat pic to celebrate Licorice and Saffron’s 4th birthday with me. This makes Licorice a grand old age of 11 and Saffron 8.
PS: It seems while I’ve been offline that I have some new followers. Welcome to my blog!
